Musings on a Friday

I was just talking about going to Hong Kong in my last post. Well , I did go to Hong Kong for vacation and came back. That was my first travel abroad and I traveled with the love of my life. Now, almost two months later, I am currently living and working in the United Arab Emirates. For two weeks now. Who knew, I’d make such big decisions in a short span of time?

I’m highly a creature of habit and I never do anything without knowing I planned for it and I prepared everything down to the last detail. I found out a few years back that I have control issues. Also, realized during the last years how anxious I am really at social situations (which I thought was just me, being snobby) and generally no fun, because I don’t tend to do anything big spontaneously. But I digress.

It’s not that I’m questioning why I made the decision to be here in the first place, because I like the newness of everything, the adventure. Everything has it’s own setbacks and for me, I expected something else so I’m trying to deal with the fact that not all things go as expected or planned. I know that if I didn’t take that chance I will regret it. My feet doesn’t want to stay in one place once I learned how to move. It’s just that it can get lonely, I realized. I’ve wanted so bad to be alone and away from family so I can be independent (traditional Filipino family) but it’s not easy even when I felt so ready that time.

I don’t want regrets definitely. And I don’t want to be homesick. I don’t think I am. Right now I’m writing to deal with disappointments.  I didn’t plan for the disappointments I might face (because who does, anyway?) It’s all excitement at the beginning.

Anywaaay. Maybe if I get my thoughts in order I’ll be more coherent. But for now, this.

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